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The image shows two people shaking hands against a bright blue background. White text above the handshake reads, "A Donor Handshake," and below it says, "or a Hug?" To the right, the biblical reference "Luke 7: 37-38" is also in white text. The image implies a question about the nature of donor relationships, encouraging a deeper connection than a formal exchange.
Fundraising Verse of the Week

A Donor Handshake or a Hug?

“A woman in that town who lived a sinful life learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, so she came there with an alabaster jar of perfume. As she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them.” (Luke 7:37-38)

Simon, one of the Pharisees, invited Jesus to his home for dinner. A sinful woman learned Jesus was there and came to worship him. Overwhelmed by his presence, she began to cry as she poured an expensive bottle of perfume on his feet and wiped them with her hair. Simon was appalled at her display of love for Jesus, and that Jesus would allow her to touch him. Jesus knew Simon’s thoughts and taught a parable about two people who owed money they couldn’t repay. One owed a lot, the second owed a little, but the moneylender graciously forgave both debts.

Jesus turned the question toward Simon, “Who loved the moneylender more?” Simon got the point. Those who have been forgiven much, love much; those who have been forgiven little, love little. Simon had not offered to wash his feet, but the woman washed his feet with her tears. Donors who have been greatly impacted by your ministry tend to respond generously. How do you recognize how much your donors love your mission? Let’s apply Gary Chapman’s five love languages to donor relationships.

Words of Affirmation
Kevin, the executive director, was under fire for a biblical stand his ministry took. When the controversy hit the media, Jeff, his key major donor immediately texted to encourage Kevin. Texts turned to phone calls and then to meetings. Jeff ultimately backed up his words with a substantial gift.

Quality Time
We strive to spend quality time with our donors. One indicator your donors value your friendship is when they offer to spend quality time with you.

Acts of Service
The contrast between Simon and this woman was stark. She loved Jesus and wanted to serve him in humility. When donors volunteer to serve in meaningful ways, they love your ministry.

Receiving Gifts
This woman poured out an expensive bottle of perfume on Jesus’ feet. Some would see it as a waste, she saw it as worship. Jesus taught, “Where your treasure is, there is where your heart is also” (Matt. 6:21). When people love your ministry, they give liberally. The opposite is also true.

Physical Touch
Simon didn’t offer a servant to wash Jesus’ feet, but this woman cried on them, wiped his feet with her hair, and kissed them. It’s the glaring difference between a donor handshake and a hug. We desire our major donors to embrace our vision and mission, but some just want to hold us at arm’s length.

Think About This: Everyone’s love language is different. If you give gifts to a donor who’s love language is words of affirmation, you are not connecting to their heart. Know your major donors intimately so you can speak his or her love language.

Response: Father, please help me love my major donors with sincerity. Help me discern when they are ready for a significant ask.


Ron Haas has served the Lord as a pastor, the vice president of advancement of a Bible college, a Christian foundation director, a board member and a fundraising consultant. He’s authored three books: Ask for a Fish – Bold Faith-Based Fundraising, Simply Share – Bold, Grace-Based Giving, and Keep on Asking – Bold, Spirit-Led Fundraising. He regularly presents fundraising workshops at ministry conferences and has written fundraising articles for  Christian Leadership Alliance’s Outcomes magazine.

Fundraising Verse of the Week

Is This the Time to Take Money?

But Elisha said to him, “Was not my spirit with you when the man got down from his chariot to meet you? Is this the time to take money or to accept clothes—or olive groves and vineyards, or flocks and herds, or male and female slaves? (2 Kings 5:26)

Naaman, the commander of the Syrian army, had a big leprosy problem. A servant girl shared good news with his wife that Elisha would heal him. So, Naaman searched for the prophet and took along 750 pounds of silver (worth approximately $230,000), 150 pounds of gold (worth approximately $4.2 million), and ten new outfits. Elisha didn’t even come to the door but sent him to wash seven times in the Jordan. Naaman was offended but his servant finally convinced him to obey the prophet and he was miraculously healed. Naaman was so grateful, he rushed back to thank Elisha with silver and gold, but Elisha refused his gifts and sent him home.

Gehazi believed Elisha had let Naaman off too easy, so he chased after this major donor to ask for a gift for himself. Gehazi shared a cover story about needing seventy-five pounds of silver and some new clothes for two young prophets. Naaman joyfully gave him twice as much as he asked. Gehazi hurried back, stashed the loot in his tent, then went to work like nothing had happened. Elisha caught him red-handed. Unfortunately, all too often, someone in Christian ministry gets caught embezzling funds. How can you protect your heart against greed? Consider these three safeguards:

Contentment
“The love of money is the root of all kinds of evil” (1 Tim. 6:10). Like many in ministry, Gehazi felt underpaid and undervalued, so he took matters into his own hands. You’ll never get paid what you’re worth—or so you think. The defense against covetousness is contentment. Paul “learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want” (Phil. 4:12). Have you learned the secret of contentment?

Others-Focused
It’s not wrong to be compensated fairly for your work. “The worker deserves his wages” (1 Tim. 5:18). Paul instructed, “the one who receives instruction in the word should share all good things with their instructor” (Gal. 6:6). Elisha could have taken a gift, but he was more concerned about Naaman’s spiritual growth than his own financial needs. He didn’t want Naaman to be confused by thinking he could pay for God’s grace.

Accountability
Financial audits usually catch embezzlers, but Gehazi’s sin was asking for his own benefit and taking advantage of the donor’s generosity. This greed is much harder to detect. As a fundraiser, you have the privilege of befriending many wealthy people. One can easily become envious of their lifestyle. Always put the interests of your ministry above your own. Don’t ask for yourself.

Think About This: “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions” (Luke 12:15). The results of greed are not worth the price. Gehazi was struck down with Naaman’s leprosy. Guard your heart!

Response: Father, please forgive me for being discontent with my wages (Luke 3:14).


Ron Haas has served the Lord as a pastor, the vice president of advancement of a Bible college, a Christian foundation director, a board member and a fundraising consultant. He’s authored three books: Ask for a Fish – Bold Faith-Based Fundraising, Simply Share – Bold, Grace-Based Giving, and Keep on Asking – Bold, Spirit-Led Fundraising. He regularly presents fundraising workshops at ministry conferences and has written fundraising articles for  Christian Leadership Alliance’s Outcomes magazine.

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